Is it Kind? Is it True? Is it Necessary?

Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates

At the first gate, ask yourself, “Is it true?”

At the second gate ask, “Is it necessary?”

At the third gate ask, “Is it kind?”

~ Rumi

The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; They go down into the inner parts of the body. 

~ Proverbs 26:22 (ESV)

Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary? - Kathy

I am on social media quite a lot for work and lately, or maybe for a long time, I catch myself thinking things like, “This is all so sad,” “Don’t people ever think about the fact that they are going to be here less than 100 years and about all the time and not-time required for their evolution?” “When will everyone stop judging each other so harshly and just listen and communicate?” Until, even with tears still formed in my eyes, I realize that I am an exact reflection of all the thoughts and statements so eloquently posted everywhere in our world and in our minds, and that in fact, I am judging. Which makes me part of the problem.

Rumi said, “Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?” Kathy said, repeatedly, that the importance of any statement is to think to oneself, “Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?” And that kindness should always come first when thinking about someone or talking about someone. Especially if what you are saying is the most negative. In one very short Satsang from June 2000, Kathy said, “Above all, be kind to one another! To quote me, in telling someone that you want to get away from them, that they are dark, and that there is darkness around them, is the cruelest thing! I would never say it! I would help you through a dark period, if you were in one. But for someone to independently tell another person that they have to get away from them because there’s so much darkness around them is inexcusable.” She further said, “Not that any of you here are guilty of that, but if you ever gossip negatively about each other, look at the effect it can have! It hurts me deeply, even if you’re not talking about me saying anything, but if you’re talking negatively about each other, it hits the ether like a bomb, and it’s painful! It’s painful to the other person. It’s painful to the person who does it, and it’s not fair. It’s always a distortion. Always, somehow, a distortion. It isn’t the whole picture. And when it’s completely untrue, and that person takes it to heart, it’s more than I can bear!”

Kathy was always emphatic in discussing the fact that ‘as within, so without’ in any thought or action, and at one point when I was really struggling hard to understand Her statement in a Satsang that we had to love everyone because we are in fact everyone, I asked, confused, if that meant that I was actually the same as a public figure that I was struggling so hard to comprehend. She responded with a resounding, “Yes. Correct. And it is most important to send love there.”

In Her Memorial Day Satsang in 2005, She said, “We can’t see our environment until we try to. Our real environment that’s within us. It’s connected to everything else. It’s the most unusual environment you can possibly imagine because it is one which is One with everything else. That’s what the sages have said. And it’s true. So we don’t go in a dark room when we touch that consciousness. It’s completely and utterly and totally and absolutely amazing how totally beautiful and complete it is. How it completes us. How it gives us understanding. How it removes us from judgment, both of ourselves and of others, and of situations. How it helps us see. You’ve heard over and over and over again, “We are one. We are one. We are one.” That’s how we see we are one. We really see. Somebody turns on the lights. Somebody turns on the lights in that dark room we go into.”

Finally, from Kathy’s December 19, 2004 Satsang, She said “Good and bad is an evaluation that your mind is making. I would say that what may be good for one is bad for another, so you can’t really make those judgments anyway. What ‘karma’ really means is action and reaction in this plane, with the consciousness limited to the ego in this state. So any interactions with others, egos in this state, those interactions create the need for resolution. Those are karmas that have to be filled, yes. Good or bad is a judgment call by the mind only.”

Ultimately, all judgment is karma. And all that we judge is truly ourselves. Complicated yet easy, really.

All Love,

Kelly